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A few days in hospital

Day 1 was definitely the hardest, when the pain started to hit I had a mini panic attack - 'was everything ok?', 'was the graft holding?', 'did I do something wrong?'.... the fear that builds up inside your body is incredible. My one chance of sight, real actual sight, is resting on this cornea graft, oh god please let it work.

Before the surgery my vision was so low in my left eye (the graft eye) that glasses couldn't improve my vision. A hard rigid gas permeable contact lense can reshape my eye for near perfect vision, but they hurt so much that I long to be able to wear glasses. I'll write an entry about the contacts soon.

The hospital stay was as to be expected... eat, drugs, pray, sleep, repeat... the staff at the Sydney Eye Hospital were fantastic and it was nice spending a few days there and forming a relationship with some of the nurses who cared for me.

On the first night my surgeon, who was also my treating specialist in Sydney who I have a fantastic relationship with, popped in to check my progress. The specialist explained that he seized the opportunity and as well as performing the graft he took the time to remove all of the dead corneal tissue and reshape my eye. Apparently, because my cornea was so weak, my eye was no longer normal eye shape and it had started to droop. So a bit of a nip and tuck later and I had a perky new eye. Who would have thought? He said this extra work will hopefully have improved my chances of regaining sight. I gave him the biggest hug of relief and gratitude. Would any surgeon take so much pride in their work and go that extra mile for a patient...? Thank you Universe for looking out for me.

I spent my time in hospital mentally preparing myself for my immediate future ...... I CAN see again. I have been following Louise Hay and her wonderfully motivating Hay House family for many years, I'm always reading success stories about how people reform from major illness by working on their mind, body and spirit. I CAN DO THIS, I will be one of those success stories.

Big changes were going to happen when I got home ....... food, alcohol, exercise, mental state, emotions, behaviours, how I spend my time, who I spend my time with, respecting myself and nurturing this wonderful gift ...

I am at peace with what is.

Miss Nat xoxo

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